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March 27th, 2012
03:33 pm - 5 @ 10.6
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So I ran 5 miles today. I didn't run it fast but the run profile looked like the above pic. I gained and lost over 600 feet (nearly 60 stories up and down). I'm out of shape but I'm going to get back in shape.
I helped out at the elementary school as a parent volunteer today. They had a substitute teacher and she wasn't sure what to do with me. I volunteered to help the kids with their in-class work packet. I was watching R and I have to say that I was disappointed. I know that I have high standards because I want R to be great, to try hard, to be the best he can be. Instead, he didn't even pass my low standards. He was distracted with a toy on his desk, kept getting out of his chair, scribbled all over his work, wrote much less neatly than many of the other kids and he avoided alphabetizing the word list. He was literally the very last kid to finish the alphabetizing (not counting the girl who arrived 20 minutes late to start the work packet). He was one of the best on the maze. I'm impressed at how good he was on it. So anyway, I know I can't mandate passion for learning. I know I can't force my kids to have a positive outlook or positive morale. That has to come from within. I only know that it's important for us to find a way to encourage and support that passion.
Time to go. Until next time.
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01:22 pm - Zou Bisou Bisou
I love it. And I don't even watch Mad Men.
So I was updating my calendar today and now I'm freaked out. So much to do in the next few months.
Didn't run the other day. Still haven't run since I was ill. No time. Too busy.
But I'm going to run today. I'm taking my mp3 player. I'm going to add Zou Bisou Bisou. Love kisses. Mmmm. Off for the run.
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March 22nd, 2012
12:31 pm - I am not prone to seeking idols but...
I am not prone to seeking idols but when I was young, Bruce Lee was my idol. These days, I view celebrities as regular humans who have a particular talent (or in some cases, not even that - think Hilton and Kardashian). I don't care how they wish to view themselves, I view them as people.
Bruce Lee, however, arrived at a time when I was trying to find myself. I was an undersized, weak, diffident, young adolescent being bullied by some of the athletes and some of the gangs in the area. This guy shows up, light weight and ferocious, and he completely changes the image of Chinese men. I watched all of his movies. I stayed up to see him on talk shows. I had posters of him. And I got into martial arts because of him. Martial arts, in many ways, saved me. I became strong, self-assured, and goal directed. Bullies no longer bullied me (perhaps I'll share a story about that some time). And, in the process, I became more attractive to women.
People often don't realize that Bruce Lee was a very philosophical person. He borrowed and incorporated ideas and philosophies from many different places into his own philosophy of life (and system of martial arts - they were inseparable for him).
I recently saw a documentary on him and it reminded me of why I found so much value in Bruce Lee as a person. Here are some of my favorite quotes from him:
“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.” “If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." “If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is made up of.” “The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.” In particular, I've been thinking about the last two quotes a lot. I don't seek immortality but I do seek to live a life worth remembering. I believe life is precious and that we should make the most of whatever we have been given in life, including the time we have. Thanks, Bruce, for setting a scared adolescent on a path toward success and excellence. You live on in the way that I live my life, in the fact that I'm married and have two children, and in the fact that I'm trying to teach them to appreciate every moment of the life they have.
The other day, R who is 6, had to write sentences for his spelling words for the week. Sometimes R gets into a funk about having to do homework and having to write sentences. So, he was in the midst of one of his bad attitudes and I said:
"I can't believe you are so lazy and so unwilling to apply yourself that you can't write a few sentences to get your homework done. I have a hard time respecting people who don't make the most of the opportunities they are given. I believe you should look at this homework as an opportunity to better yourself, not as a chore to be finished. Can you please try to do this with a better attitude?" He still wasn't happy with me or his homework. The next word was "admire." R asked me what it meant and I explained that it means you respect or have a positive opinion of someone or something. He thought about that for a moment and then R asked me who I admired. I said:
"I admire people who are willing to take chances and work hard and who make the best of the opportunities they are given. I admire people who are talented in some particular way but I most admire people who are talented and find a way to develop and cultivate their talent so that it has a positive impact in the world."
His next sentence? "I admire my dad." I loved that. He was angry at me for being so intense about the homework and then he popped out with that sentence. I made him add "and my mom" because, as I explained, she is probably harder working than me, as hard as that is to believe.
T has been in a good place lately. He helps clear everyone's dishes every night. When J asked him to rewrite his story about fencing that was a homework assignment (which included a revision process), he got miffed and wrote sloppily. So J threw it out. Now, often in a dynamic like this it continues to unravel as T gets angrier. He then responds by writing increasingly poorly and it becomes a bad situation. But this time, he switched. He decided to try hard and he wrote nicely in his revision. Except...he didn't do it in the 3 paragraph format that was required so he had to rewrite it again. At this point, it would have been understandable if he was negative about the assignment. Instead, he rewrote it with a positive attitude, adding interesting details to make it a nice final written product. We were both so proud of him. If only we can keep him in this positive space...
Still haven't gone running since I became ill. Perhaps today will be the day.
So, loads of work piling up. Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to writing I go.
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March 19th, 2012
12:35 pm - How much do you compromise of yourself?
I keep grappling with the same issue. How much do you give up of yourself to make sure that your family and relationships remain whole?
I think each of us must compromise in a relationship because a give and take is always involved. I don't believe in Ayn Rand's view that you pursue only what is important to you, and in the process, you make your relationships and society more complete because it is the striving of the individual above the collective that makes the world move toward perfection. I don't think it is that simple. Rand's philosophy easily becomes a situation of supreme selfishness in which you get what you want and don't give a damn about anyone else unless it is of benefit to you. Ayn Rand believed altruism was evil and selfishness was a virtue. I might note that Ayn Rand was completely against giving to, or taking from, the collective (i.e., society, welfare, the government) but she collected Social Security and may have collected Medicare toward the end of her life.
But I do get the point. If you continually compromise yourself, if you always place the interests of others above your own, then you destroy parts of yourself in small ways. But what is wrong with sacrificing for your loved ones? For your family? Your love, your children, are your values, so there should be no inconsistency. The world, however, is not so simple. What is best for my love, for my kids, may not always be what I, as an individual (as a selfish entity) want or need for myself. In this case, I might have a conflict of needs and of values. Then I must either live for myself or I must sacrifice a part of myself for the sake of my relationships. Ayn Rand would call my sacrifice for the sake of others immoral because pursuing my individual needs and happiness above all others is the true virtue.
Well, if you follow Ayn Rand's advice, the self above all others, then you can justify all that the financial executives did when they foisted the mortgage fraud onto the backs of tax payers and destroyed our economy (which is still being destroyed).
Where is the balance? I believe in self-sacrifice for the greater good, including family and relationships. However, I also believe in not selling out your core self, your core identity. I believe there can be balance of the self against the needs of a relationship. But I also think there can be imbalance. Then, what do you do? Subvert your needs for the needs of the family and loved ones? Focus on the needs of your relationships and ignore your own needs? And the weak pabulum of "just talk it out" won't work in my own dilemma. I've tried, so I know.
I will continue to move forward and focus on the positives. I live a good life. I have a wonderful partner and two wonderful kids. Yet, I'm lonely and parts of me are unfulfilled. Is it that we can never be satisfied with what we have? I don't think that's the case here but where does the line of compromise end? No answers really. I will just keep moving in life, trying leave a positive impact.
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March 13th, 2012
05:45 pm - I write like a child
So rushed. Broken grammar. Disconnected thoughts. What the hell? I'm a better writer than this and I wish I had time to compose my thoughts properly. I guess getting something down is better than writing nothing. Or is it?
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05:43 pm - Recovering
So it has been an intense last few weeks. R had norovirus. For non-parents who haven't had the particular joy of caring for a sick child with the "stomach flu" while trying to clean up the results every 15 minutes, I hope you never experience it. For all of the parents who might read this...you know what I'm talkin' 'bout. We felt so bad for him that we eventually set up a bed on the bathroom floor and I slept next to him every night for 3 nights. Then J caught something nasty. We think it might've been the flu - 5 plus days of 103+ degree fever. She was a mess. At least R had recovered. Then I caught what J had. Both parent incapacitated...not good. We ended up at the Dr.'s - J had pneumonia as a secondary infection. I was on the way. I CANNOT believe that J went snowtubing while she was sick because the only thing R said he wanted to do with winter was to go sledding. Except our biggest snow happened before Halloween so no sledding. J bought tix at a snow place and we went tubing so R would have a winter - it was our only chance for him to not lose a complete year of snow.
T stepped up and helped out. I have hope for him - he really showed something. Cleaning up dishes, setting tables, trying to get food ready, putting clothes away, folding clothes, doing keyboard and homework without complaining...seriously, who is he?!
So far neither T nor R have caught what J and I had and we are finally recovering. For the first time in my life I've had vertigo. Kind of like being drunk, just without the fun parts.
If I keep getting stronger, this fast, I may try running later this week. A few weeks ago I gave a talk in Houston, at Rice U., and while there I went running every day. My first day in Houston I clocked 8:40 miles for 6.1 miles. Not bad for being terribly out of shape. Before I became sick I ran 8+ miles in hills at about 11:00 pace. Not bad for the serious hills I typically run. So we'll see what kind of condition I'm in when I start up again.
Time to go. Just wanted to say hi. Hi.
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January 31st, 2012
09:57 am - I am here but now I'm gone
Like a dandelion seed floating on the wind currents, I float into this journal and then I am whisked away by the ever present, and sometimes tornadic, winds of life.
Boys are growing. I'm still running. Not as much as I'd like but getting out there with 4-7 mile runs 3-4 times a week. I should be in better shape for my activity. I think I like wine, pizza, and ice cream too much.
I had torn a rotator cuff in the spring of 2011 (apparently I don't bounce on asphalt when rollerblading as well as I did when I was 20). I'm finally recovering enough to do some pushups and weights. I did two sets of 35 pushups and two sets of 100 situps and...ouch...I'm really out of shape.
We had made up a bunch of silly words as a "secret" language. One of the words was "jambeelabbudoo" which means "I love you too." Eventually we outgrew the silliness and I had totally forgotten about our language until R said "jambeelabbudoo" to me during tuck in. It was so sweet. Then he said, "we used to have other words too but I don't remember them." I hugged him and said I didn't remember them either.
It was quiet, in the dark, as I lay there next to him, getting ready to leave after tucking him in.
Then he said, "it's like a wave."
"What's like a wave?"
"It's like a giant wave on the beach."
"What is?"
"It comes and takes everything away and leaves a few seashells. Like jambeelabbudoo."
I was amazed.
"Yes, it is like that. Just like that."
"Jambeelabbu." I kissed him on the cheek.
"Jambeelabbudoo." He smiled and hugged me.
Is the giant wave the ever present passage of time?
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March 31st, 2011
12:43 am - I don't do memes but...
I'm around tonight and have a moment to breathe so I'll do a meme.
But first...Murphy has a hurt leg. He's limping. I don't like seeing him in pain. Plus, it reminds me that he is getting older (and by extension, so am I). After X-rays and so forth, we are taking him to a doggy orthopedist. I'm sure that will be inexpensive.
The kids are well. T is doing fencing and as a result R has become interested. R is now the youngest member of the fencing club. He's cute out there, trying to fend off huge people wielding swords (foils). T has shown mental and emotional resilience. He's lost a few matches in tournaments, to tears, but has learned some tough but important lessons in life. He has bounced back to try harder and develop new techniques. Most importantly, he has not given up.
We've written more textbooks and now have a 2nd edition of one of them. Plus about 7 edited books. So busy.
Still trying to work out. Rowed 1/2 hour yesterday. Did 2 sets of 60 pushups, 200 situps. Really jumped rope for the first time in a decade. Damn, my arms hurt from jumping rope!
So here's the meme:
1. How many clowns would it take to freak you out?
Silly question. One. With a knife. Or hundreds trying to mount me.
2. What is your favorite dessert?
Hmmm. Tough one. I guess high quality vanilla ice cream with Luxardo Gourmet Maraschino Cherries. Really, that's it.
3. Are the undies you're wearing right now age appropriate?
Ha ha. I guess so. No tighty whities, just boxers. But not old man boxers.
4. Five things you can touch right now without getting up.
TV remote, a wooden box that drops metal balls onto chimes, DVD Discovery Ultimate Guide to Volcanoes, my watch, and a piece of floss that one of the boys left on the desk for some inexplicable reason (I hope it's clean).
5. You have to be somewhere on the fourth floor of a building. Do you take the lift/elevator?
Stairs.
6. What is your ideal Saturday afternoon morning?
I sleep in. That never happens. Never. Or sex. That never happens on a Saturday morning anymore either.
For an afternoon? Go for a walk with the family, including the dog, return, shower, start a fire in the stove, and watch a DVD together in a heap.
7. What are you thinking about right now?
What I'd like to do on a Saturday morning. You can guess.
8. Write the first word that comes to mind.
Sex.
9. Dog person or cat person?
Once I was a dog person through and through. Didn't like cats. Then I met Mooch. So...I have to honestly say I'm 50/50. Each interacts differently with me.
10. If you came across $2,000 (or other currency) would you keep it or turn it in?
Keep it unless I believed I could find the rightful owner. Perhaps I would post an anonymous ad on something like Craigslist or in a newspaper and anyone inquiring would have to describe details (where was it, what was it in, when was it lost, etc.).
11. What was the last thing that you bought?
Texas Holdem software with the best artificial intelligence engine out there. I'm still wondering how it could call my "all in" bluff after the river with only an Ace high.
12. If you could afford to go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Depends on the family. These are no longer individual choices. For me? I've always wanted to go to Kathmandu or Machu Picchu. Instead, we will go to Colorado and Disneyworld this coming year.
13. Where do you see yourself in five years?
Hopefully same job, same house. I see myself with two boys, 11 and 13. Hopefully same dog and cat (but that's a dream). Writing more books.
14. Last book you've read?
A management textbook. Also a book about negotiating. Currently reading? Working by Terkel (it's older but still relevant) and Musicophilia by Sacks.
15. What are you doing this weekend?
Two music lessons for the boys. Going for a walk. Gardening. Finishing up our Easter float for the parade competition (it's a little one, on a Radio Flyer wagon).
16. If you could play any musical instrument, which one would you play?
I play a guitar, but not well. I'd play piano.
17. How are you?
Tired. Busy. Strangely lonely at times. Afraid for the world. Yet...good, hopeful, optimistic, happy.
Good night.
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March 9th, 2010
12:46 pm - So, yes, still alive
Thought for the day: Balance and moderation are critical in most (all?) things that I do.
How can it have been a year? I miss you. No kidding. I really, really do. But I have to do what I have to do right now. That means BE PRODUCTIVE.
What have I been up to?
1. Being a dad to two young boys...soccer, t-ball, flag football, ice skating lessons, music lessons, school, homework...
2. Working. Published a textbook. Working on another textbook. Working on a general business book.
3. Exercising. Became so busy that it was hard to keep up with exercise. Starting to gain again but never want to go back to THAT place. Back on the exercise wagon. Actually did 100 consecutive pushups (real ones) a week ago! Can't remember the last time I could do that. High school? Running slower than when I was really in shape but still with it. Did 5 miles a couple of days ago, the first 3 slowly with the dog (he is always slow) then the last 2 at sub-8 minute pace...in hills.
4. Improving the home. New roof. New retaining wall. Large garden. New water treatment. New lights.
5. Doing fun things...circus, went to HS reunion, etc. Proved to myself that I'm a pretty good Texas Holdem player when I went to the reunion. It was at a casino & dining/dance hall. J gave me a grubstake and I won $500 in a day and half at a $3/$1, $100 buy in, no limit game.
6. Prepping our lives for economic havoc. This, perhaps, takes the most time of all. We are not in the safe zone in the economy yet.
Sometimes...writing, reading. I've been reading a book called "Working" by Studs Terkel. It's an older book but it is still great -- and relevant.
I love LJ. I love my friends on LJ. I don't love that I can't get anything done when I'm active in LJ. I'm much more productive when I'm gone. Perhaps I can find balance. Easy, right?
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January 22nd, 2009
11:18 am - And...
Happy Birthday Fitfool!
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January 21st, 2009
11:24 am - So freakin' busy
Classes start today and I'm frantically getting everything ready. Proud of myself though...kept with the running even with the cold snap. On one of the days last week I did 6.4 miles in below 9 degree weather. The wool sock was critical in that kind of weather. Yes, THE wool sock. A single one. Plus two on the feet.
I want to write about the enchanted forest. T's term for our walk in the woods after an ice storm, everything coated in a shimmering crystalline coating.
Yesterday was a magnificent day for the U.S. We've shown that we still believe in our foundational principles. But President Obama is in an unenviable position with the economy. I continue to have strong beliefs about what is coming and I can't believe all of these smart economists can't see it.
Well, off for a quick run, shower, then to the PhD stats class. How fun! I have more students auditing than enrolled. How does that work? And my Master's level class? Totally packed. Overfull. Have to change everything up to make it happen.
I will be positive. I will be positive.
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January 9th, 2009
12:44 am - One more thing
T stuck a coin in a socket at school today and nearly electrocuted himself. He didn't even get shocked but the dime is now melted and blackened. WTF was he thinking? He really knows better. We've told him a thousand times...
He promised, promised, promised never to do that again. And R promised to never put anything in a socket. I've heard that before....from T.
Alive to 25, that's our motto.
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January 8th, 2009
11:55 pm - Happy Merry New HannuKwanzaaChristmasukah Year!
I tried to squish all of the holidays into one happy greeting. Time is flying. Time has flown. We didn't get a letter out this year although we did send cards. Last year we did neither. Where did December go?
Thanksgiving was quiet, spent with the boys. Neither of them like turkey, smoked or otherwise. We ordered a smoked turkey from Greenberg. People seem to either love or hate smoked turkeys. J and I love them. Made the usual fixings plus steak for the kids. Opened a 2000 Bordeaux. Nice meal, warm fire. I've been a soup making fool lately so i made a smoked turkey soup out of the leftovers. Delicious. Turkey makes me flatulent. J too. Can you imagine what the soup does?
We went to Hershey Park twice on a 2 day pass. The first day the park was desolate. We nearly had the entire amusement park to ourselves. We thought "so this is what it is like to be Paris Hilton or Miley Cyrus." About a week later we returned and it was busier but still slower than past years. The economy strikes again.
Set up our tree on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Avoided the blue spruce Christmas tree of a thousand tiny daggers this year. Got a fir but don't know what kind. Nice tree though. Kids still decorate the lower tiers...I'm going to miss that. We redistributed some ornaments but kept some of the branches laden with far too many ornaments for one branch.
December came in a rush. Shopping, wrapping, letters, Nutcracker show, final exams, projects, grading, Plus we have been working extra hours on numerous projects, trying to keep some irons hot.
T lost his first tooth in the first week of December. A couple of days later he earned his yellow belt in Tae Kwon Do. That night he said it was the best night of his life (for the belt and for the visit by the fairy for his tooth).
As an aside, have I mentioned that R has been potty trained since around his birthday in May? He was a little more challenging than T because he just didn't seem interested but once he decided it went smoothly. Rare accidents since then.
We played in the snow with the kids and built a snow wall. I want more times (and memories) like that.
T & R love Christmas. It's a magic time. T has been asking more questions about Santa, especially about the department store/photo op Santas. After hearing the Beach Boys' "Santa's Beard" (http://www.sing365.com/music/Lyric.nsf/Santa%27s-Beard-lyrics-Beach-Boys/7D7915172C26304C48256982002A2DC9) T concluded that they were all helper Santas. I have some internal conflict about misleading T or R, even about Santa, so I'm careful not to lie to them. So far I have given answers such as "Santa's magic comes from love and imagination" and I have remained evasive about specifics. It's a magical time but I always want our kids to believe what I tell them.
We left a sparkling dust imprint of a boot on the fireplace hearth. The kids loved it -- the pure joy on their faces was something to behold.
On New Year's Day we went to see the Mummer's Fancy Brigades in Philly. Amazing! We saw the sneak peek 2 or 3 days before and decided to go back and see the real thing. Made marvelous hats at the sneak peek too. Made Pad Thai for our New Year meal. Perhaps that will be a tradition. I also cleaned the upper and lower oven. What a mess!
To demonstrate my manliness and offset my domesticated tendencies, I also installed new ceiling tiles in the basement during December, wirewheeled the rust off the oven and painted it, shoveled ice and snow, installed window shades, and did a lot of pushups.
I closed 2008 with 829 miles of running for the year. Short of my 1000 goal but a vast improvement over 2007 (only 503 miles). I'm slowly getting back into shape. I still drink too much at night so I'm cutting that back. I was up to the equivalent of 3-4 drinks almost every night. I know why I drink -- my brain thinks too much about everything and I'm trying to sedate it. Plus escapism. I have a lot on my mind -- and heart. Not good. Carrying too much weight from excesses (food and drink), underexercising, and sleep deprivation. I'm improving on all fronts. Ran 4 (M), 4 (Tu), 6.2 (W), 3.3 (Th) miles this week, even in ice and snow.
I've been reading books. "The Hyperinflation Survival Guide." "Confessions of an Economic Hit Man." Confessions is a striking insight into how the world really works and why so many countries hate the U.S.
I''m also still reading "On Food and Cooking." I read just a page here or there and I'm around pp. 270 now. I'm still learning so much about cooking. I made some rocking gingerbread cookies for the holidays but crumbled my sugar cookie shaped like a gingerbread man because I tried to move it when it was still too hot. I didn't know you had to let cookies cool before placing them on racks to cool.
The other day was went to a b-day party at a tumbling place. T and R both ran around like crazy and R jumped up on a bar and began swinging his legs around in the air, inverted. Then he rushed over to us, eyes flashing, red-faced, and said "I can do amazing things!" J and I heartily agreed. He can do amazing things. It will be interesting to see how he develops. He is a very even personality -- most of the time. And he is physically strong and coordinated.
Well, it's late and I have lots of work for Friday, plus dinner out and shopping on Friday night. Saturday is busy with T's basketball and a birthday party. How will I get the report and analyses done? Good night!
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November 27th, 2008
07:00 am - Happy Thanksgiving!
I have so much to be thankful for.
The boys
J
Mooch
Murphy (yes, the oaf)
A warm home filled with love
My health
My family's health
Life
A good paying job for both J and I
Opportunity
and so on...
I'm writing the next part not to whine or complain. It's just a remarkable string of recent events that deserves documenting. Things became pretty crazy around or right after the last post. I had been having trouble with my wireless connection to the Internet so I hadn't been able to check e-mail or do any of the things requiring access. This put me severely behind in my class management. Then we had a heavy snow that required a day of shoveling. It was heavy, wet, and hit the trees while they still had leaves, so a lot of trees were damaged and branches fell. It was windy as well. Power went out. Then the phone and Internet went out. Glad we had a generator! A day later power went back on but the phone and Internet were out for several days. Just about the time everything came back, it was Halloween. Of course we celebrated with the kids, trick-or-treating and going to parties. What happened next?
- furnace went out
- dryer died
- flat tire for the van
- dog had terrible hot spots (staph infection)
- trees needed to be pruned or brought down
- Virtumonde infection on my computer that took 3 days to eradicate (most people have to reformat their hard drive)
- R got sick
- I got sick
There's more but I can't remember right now. Don't care if I do,. It was such a crazy string of events and it put me so incredibly far behind in everything. I'm still scrambling to catch up.
Through it all I have managed to continue running, even when I first became sick. I finally had to give it up while I tried to recover from some respiratory virus I caught from R. I'll be back at it next week. I'm getting faster and healthier. I heard that a large scale study suggests that for every 2 inches of extra waist size I would have a 17% increased chance of dying over a period of about 10 years (13% for women). Well, I think I can probably shave 2 inches so I'm working on it. Last year I really let things fall apart. Part way through last year I was depressed and I simply quit exercising. I think I logged about 500 miles total. This year I will probably hit 880 or so, less than the 1000 I normally work toward. I didn't get started until well into the year because I was still struggling with my attitude. I think I've turned the corner.
This year, I have been trying to focus on positive things, think positive thoughts. I've been keeping myself disciplined about exercising and work. It's beginning to pay off.
( Don't Read This -- Depressing Stuff About the Economy )
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
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October 21st, 2008
12:06 am - My legs are already cramping -- it's going to be a long night
Whenever I truly abuse my muscles I get muscle cramps later in the day. They often hit while I'm asleep, thighs, calves, quads, going into spasms that result in rock hard painful knots that make me writhe in pain. I'm already cramping so I know I'm in trouble. I'm typing this while stretching...
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October 20th, 2008
11:11 pm - Kids are asleep
Both boys are snuggled in their beds. We've had a great summer and a wonderful fall. Summer included summer camp for T and trips to Ocean City (we rented a condo on the beach), Anaheim (to visit family, go to a conference, go to Legoland, and visit Disneyland), and a trip to Chicago. We went to 6 Flags, Franklin Institute, and Sesame Place a number of times. Fall has included birthday parties, fund-raising auctions, more trips to 6 Flags and Sesame Place, Halloween decorations, art projects...so many fun activities.
Among my favorite moments in life are the few minutes I spend carrying T and R to their beds after a long and fun day visiting an amusement park or engaging in some other fun activity. I carefully pluck them out of their car seats, hold them close with their arms instinctively wrapped around my neck, and carry them inside and up the stairs. They usually sigh and hold me close as I carry them. I can remember the feelings I had as a child when being carried to my bed. I remember feeling happy and tired, feeling secure and well-loved by my parents. I'm happy that I can share that particular memory with our kids. I carefully place them in bed, remove their socks and shoes (why do little boys have such stinky feet?), tuck the blankets around their necks, place stuffed animals in their hands, and give them warm hugs and kisses. They usually respond, even from a deep sleep. They are both getting so big I wonder how much more time I'm going to have to do this with them.
I made green curry chicken with fresh Thai basil tonight. I've loved curry as long as I can remember. My mom used to make it with boxes of curry mix stirred into the food. I ate as much as I could, nearly addicted to the stuff. Much later in life I was surprised to discover that there was no curry herb, no curry tree, and no curry nut bush. I was truly astonished to learn that curry was a mixture of spices. Jean and I have made curry from scratch and curry from jars or boxes of mix. It's all good in my book. Tonight I made it with a jar of Thai green curry. I browned the chicken at high heat until Maillard reactions flavored everything, then added coconut milk and curry. I used half the coconut milk listed in the recipe. I knew this would make everything thin, but I had a plan. Reducing coconut milk is a good thing for health. Once everything was boiling again, I tossed in bamboo shoots, baby corn, green peppers, and eggplant. Shortly after I could tell the sauce was thin so I thickened it with corn starch. Finally, I served it with fresh basil for J and me. Delicious. T and R had meatballs and chicken nuggets, respectively. They have not yet developed a passion for curry -- far from it. I'm stuffed and ended my night with 18 year Macallan scotch, distilled in 1979 (we've had the scotch for some time).
Moving all that wood and playing kickball with the kids afterwards has sealed my fate. My ass hurts. I'm going to be sore tomorrow.
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05:12 pm - I have 15 minutes...
J and I moved about 3,200 lbs. of wood today. We were supposed to do it this weekend but things got crazy. Sunday morning I was supposed to mow the lawn and then move the wood in the afternoon. We woke a little late, I took the dog for a 1.6 mile run, and then I ran out of time to mow. We headed off to Chester to a do-it-yourself art shop where T and R were able to make art projects of their choosing. It was originally supposed to be a birthday present for me but after we visited the studio we decided it would be much more fun if each of us helped the kids make a project. R made a green glitter-covered paper-mache cat that he called Oscar. T made a wooden chest with copper paint, a foil decoration for the top, and decoupage on the front, back, and sides. Both projects turned out great and we had a lot of fun.
We headed straight from the art studio to a birthday party that T was invited to attend. R napped in the van and I drove around, eventually parking in front of 5 Below. I napped briefly and when R woke we went into the shop and bought a bunch of cheap and fun Halloween decorations. R was so thoughtful -- he even asked to get duplicates of some of the better decorations so that his brother could have them too. What 3 year old has that kind of insight? We headed back, picked up T and J, then went to Michael's for the Halloween half price sale. Bought our first two Halloween Village decorations. One is a "Pirate's Pub & Grub" and the other a "Hillside Mausoleum" by Lemax. Both have lights, sounds, and animated creatures/characters. The pirate one was a demo and had some broken features. We bought it for half price plus another 10% off. The mausoleum we bought for half price. I think they were a good purchase. T just sat in front of them for about an hour, watching them, R joining him from time to time.
I went out and started mowing after getting the dinner set up to be cooked. J finished up dinner while I mowed in the dark. Ironically, I could see okay except when cars drove down the road because their headlights blinded me. Needless to say, I didn't move the wood yesterday.
Also, it turned out that the chicken was underdone. Why? Because R was fiddling with the probe. At least that's what we think happened. We nuked it in the microwave to finish it up and it was still pretty tasty. For the second time, we made soup from the leftovers. The first time was pretty good. This time -- wow, was it ever good! We used basil, lovage, thyme, salt, carrots and smoked chipotle peppers. We'll have to do it again.
Today was supposed to be a work day. Unfortunately, moving and stacking wood, meeting with an electrician about having recessed lighting installed, meeting with a tree person about some trees in the yard, fielding a few phone calls, playing kickball with Aidan and T and R for a play date, walking the dog, and writing here pretty much used up my day. I'm SO behind. But I will smile and think positively. I can do it. I can do it.
Time is up for this post.
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October 18th, 2008
11:32 pm - Pesto and soccer
We needed to harvest our basil because of a frost advisory for tonight. J and I talked about it and agreed that perhaps I should stay home with R today and make pesto. J and I also talked about the possibility of having me drive to T's soccer game after his practice so I could watch him play. We both know that he's been getting better and better and he's come close to scoring a goal several times. We figured out that it wouldn't be practical or possible for me to make it to the game. We joked that if I stayed home T would be sure to score a goal today. Realizing that it was a real possibility that he would score his first goal, J brought the vidcam with her.
I stayed home and made three quadruple batches of pesto using basil from our garden, fresh pine nuts, garlic grown in our garden, and high quality cold-pressed extra-virgin olive oil (we give some away and it freezes pretty well). R was making me crazy, getting into everything, but I managed to get him to help with the blending process. It was fun at first but I was pretty tired of the process by the end of the day. I hope I don't have to pick a single basil leaf for a whole year.
When J and T came home I immediately asked, "did T score a goal today?" J said, "no -- he scored two goals." Later we viewed the goals on the tape. The tape of the first goal showed a lot of grass and it caught his foot hitting the ball just before he scored the goal but you can't see much of him or the goal. It turns out J was so excited that she was shouting and moving so the shot was a bit off (an understatement). But we did get to see his foot hit the ball and the joy on his face right after the goal. That was pretty cool. The second goal was missing. J thinks she taped over it by accident. I'm a little disappointed but joyous I was able to see T kick the ball that scored his first goal. I was also joyous that I wasn't the one who shot the tape. J would have been pissed at me if I had shot that tape, I know it.
We went to the Field of Screams in the afternoon. It was a playground with Halloween decorations, suitable for the young. R and T were able to trick-or-treat, play on the equipment, and look at all the fun decorations. T wanted to keep playing the sledgehammer and bell game for kids. I think he liked the idea that he could make it ring every time. I had to swing pretty darn hard to make the adult bell ring. Fun afternoon. In the evening we ate burgers that I made. J and I had bleu cheese with ours, T and R, cheddar. Watched another episode of Addams Family. I never thought about it before, but after watching two episodes, I think Morticia is kind of hot.
Ran 1.6 miles w/ the dog. That's all I had time for. Tomorrow, mow the front lawn (equal to about 2 miles).
'night.
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10:09 am - T's Pick
I forgot to mention, we've been discussing the idea of a democracy with T and explaining that we get to elect the next President (we haven't explained the electoral college yet). We talked about the candidates and the strengths and weaknesses of each. In my opinion, we presented a pretty balanced explanation. Then we mentioned that if elected, Obama would be our first black President. T was curious about that. Why the first? So we explained slavery, civil rights, etc. in a fairly brief fashion. We continued discussing the candidates. Finally, we asked T, "who would you vote for?" He said "the dark skinned one." We explained that many people would find it offensive to call someone dark skinned and he was completely perplexed. Why would people be upset if it was true? At the end he said he would vote for Obama but not call him dark skinned.
( Not Happy Stuff About the Economy )
I laughed at this letter from a former hedge fund manager who made 866% last year betting against the financial houses.
http://www.cnbc.com/id/27239479
"I was in this game for the money. The low hanging fruit, i.e. idiots whose parents paid for prep school, Yale, and then the Harvard MBA, was there for the taking. These people who were (often) truly not worthy of the education they received (or supposedly received) rose to the top of companies such as AIG, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers and all levels of our government. All of this behavior supporting the Aristocracy, only ended up making it easier for me to find people stupid enough to take the other side of my trades. God bless America."
Enough...time to go make pesto!
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09:52 am - We all have our unique talents
Yesterday was a good day. It was a regular work day but I received so many nice e-mails and messages saying Happy Birthday that it really made my day. I ended up losing about an hour and a half to conversation with J's parents. Pleasant conversation but I had so much to do! In contrast, I spoke to my sister for about half an hour, with her talking about the challenges of getting their house in order and getting the daycare set up. I spoke to my mom for about 2 minutes (her choice) but we rarely have much to talk about so that was okay. The only two things that bothered me were the fact that I only managed to run 2.1 miles because of the phone call with J's parents and R was being a pill late in the evening, which was an extension of how he had behaved at school.
In the afternoon we picked up the kids, went to Tae Kwon Do for T, then picked up a pizza for dinner. After dinner we watched "Addams Family" on a Netflix DVD. I love movie nights with the kids and lately we've been watching a lot of old sitcom reruns. Our kids are going to be the only ones who know what the original Batman looked like, who Gilligan is, why the Munsters and Adams families are creepy, and so on.
I've always known T is not interested in playing catch. I've tried since he was quite little to play catch with him, even as early as 2, but he never wanted to play more than a couple of turns. In contrast, he's always had a love of spinning things, gears, wheels, etc. He liked spinning things even before he could speak. I'm still trying to get him to play catch, if only to build his skills and reflexes. There's a friend of his, Aidan, who can throw a small football about 25 yards with a spiral. His other friend, Connor, can throw one about 10 yards. So T is ready to learn, except he is not interested. On the other hand, T is physically strong and pretty good at Tae Kwon Do. He also wants to learn to fence. Also, T is very good at Legos. He has assembled 8 year old thousand plus piece kits all by himself. Aidan cannot do the basic ones. I want T to be able to play catch but I'm happy he is interested in other things and has a talent for them.
R is interested in everything. Or is it nothing? He doesn't seem to have a single passion. He doesn't care about trucks or cars but he will play with them. He likes dressing up as a pirate for a few minutes. He will play catch for a couple of turns. We don't watch a ton of television but even when we have it on, he doesn't seem that interested. When we asked his teachers about his interests they pretty much said the same thing. It seems his greatest interest is doing whatever his brother is doing. He seems to have a natural art and music inclination but I think that's true of a lot of kids.
It will be fascinating to see where their passions go.
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09:35 am - Long-winded ramblings about oil, the economy, and so forth
My dad sent me an e-mail claiming there were 503 billion barrels of oil in the Bakken Formation and that Democrats, environmentalists, left-wing Republicans have blocked efforts to help America become independent of oil.
My father and I have long disagreed on matters of race, environment, religion, and so on. He's from deep Mississippi. I am not.
For some reason his e-mail twitched a hair on my head and I went on a wild writing spree in response to the e-mail he sent. I wrote all of this before Congress approved the bail out -- oops, rescue plan.
( Long, long winded rambling on oil and the economy - BORING )
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October 17th, 2008
03:32 pm - Food Fun
I saw this in fitfool’s post, which came from webmd's post. I don’t usually do memes. I think I’ve done only one other meme. However, this seemed interesting and I’m always curious about new foods. I had to Google some of the names and I was surprised to discover that I had eaten some of the things I had to Google. If you want to play:
1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment at www.verygoodtaste.co.uk linking to your results.
I've included some comments in bold as well.
1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp – At first I read this as crap. Ha ha.
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho – Had to look this up to remember but I definitely had this.
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses – also had to look this one up but I remember it well.
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes – We grow them in our garden. Some of the varieties are amazingly full flavored. Not like the red racquetballs they call tomatoes in the grocery store.
22. Fresh wild berries – Yum. Watch out for the ants.
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese - I suppose I'd try it.
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper – I can tolerate a lot of heat in peppers, Thai super chiles don’t faze me – but this pepper fried my brain and tongue.
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl – Perfect winter fare.
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar - Don’t usually smoke but this was a surprisingly good combination
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects- I might try it, depending on the insect
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more – A weakness of ours.
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut – fresh donuts rock
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear – It was straight from the cactus in the wild and we would cut off the spines ourselves. The pears were so tasty -- I had to pick the nearly invisible spines out of my lips. I guess I missed some of them.
52. Umeboshi – I once at an entire jar of them. My mother was not happy with me. My sister did the same. Mom wasn’t happy with her either.
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal – I eat one of these or something similar from time to time but I almost always feel ill afterward
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV – Made some ourselves.
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips – Generally not as good as chocolate.
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin - Still not sure what this is. The clay used for diarrhea?
64. Currywurst
65. Durian – I can’t believe that I enjoyed a food that Andrew Zimmer couldn’t eat.
66. Frogs’ legs – Taste like chicken.
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake – How good are these? Especially in New Orleans with a cup of chicory coffee.
68. Haggis – No, but I’d try it.
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette - I suppose I'd try it.
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill – Nope. Could never knowingly do it unless it was a survival situation.
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail – Better than I expected. Recently, I heard about snail caviar when watching Andrew Zimmer. Really?
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant – It was amazing. But was it worth the price?
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers – anise flowers are particularly tasty
89. Horse – Nope. Only a survival situation. Like the horses too much.
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab – So very good! Make it at home with Panko instead of bread crumbs.
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake
I’ve eaten some other interesting things, such as:
Squid
Octopus (sushi style)
Longan
Morton Bay Bugs
Cendol
Crayfish
Ceviche
Fish head stew
I’ve never tried but think I would try:
Turducken (chicken stuffed inside a duck stuffed inside a turkey, then deep fried)
I’ve never tried and most likely never will try:
Xinchin (C. and S. America)
Hakarl
Surströmming
Raake Orret
Shiokara
Jeotgal
Roede sild
I guess I have a thing against eating fermented sea food.
Back to work!
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07:25 am - Not Just Another Day
I love the seasons, and fall is one of my favorites. Of course, if you ask me in any particular season, it is likely to be one of my favorites. Fall is truly wonderful. I like pumpkin picking with the kids, the brilliant palette of leaves, the crispness of the morning air. I hope we have a chance to pile up leaves like we did last year so the kids can take flying leaps into them.
Today, I'm wondering if I'm in the summer or fall of my life. I don't really mind either way. They are both one of my favorite seasons. But I'm certainly not, as they say, a spring chicken. On Facebook I've reconnected with some old friends and two of them mentioned the flying kick breaks I used to do in karate demonstrations. I'd begin with a running a start and then jump as high as I could, breaking boards 3 feet over my head, falling into a roll on the ground. In the seasonal metaphor of my life, that's a spring activity. I won't be doing anything like that anytime soon. So I'm definitely in late summer or early fall, both beautiful times of the year -- and beautiful times of my life.
T made up a joke.
T: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
T: R.
Me: R who?
T: Why do you sound like a werewolf?
I've been sticking with the running but the amount is below my personal goals. M: 3.7, T: 4.2, W: rest, Th: 2.1, F: ?
I hope I can find the time to do a 5 or 6 mile run today, but I'll take 3 if that's all I can get.
R is the sweetest child and he gives the best hugs. We have a routine that I hope to remember forever. In the mornings, both kids have to ask to be excused from the table (or else they run around like wild monkeys while we are trying to eat). The routine happens at the end of the breakfst meal.
R: I want to get down.
J or me: Sure. What do you say?
R: Thank you for the delicious...what was it?
J or me: What do you think it was?
R: I don't know.
J or me: It's morning. What do we eat in the morning?
R: BREFUKAST!
J or me: Right.
R: Thank you for the delicious BREFUKAST. May I please be excused?
All of us, T included, love the BREFUKAST part. It's so cute.
( About the economy )
( This could offend the strongly religious but is not intended to offend )
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October 13th, 2008
09:37 am - We see what we focus on
I often think about how reality is defined in large part by what we perceive. If we only think about the negative aspects of a spouse or partner then it is not surprising to find that we begin to dislike being around him or her. If we only think about the negative aspects of the world, such as the economy, supergerms, global warming, etc. then the world is a dark, scary, and forbidding place.
On the other hand, if we think in positive terms, then we find we enjoy being around our spouses and partners in life. We enjoy the fall colors, the taste of a freshly picked apple, and the joy of a child drawing a face on a pumpkin.
Study after study shows that people with positive attitudes enjoy many benefits in life. They are healthier, have more friends, heal faster, are better adjusted, more motivated, promoted faster, etc. Being a social scientist, I sometimes wonder about the direction of causality. Is it that healthy people, with more friends, more money, more promotions, and a more supportive family are more positive? Or is it that the positive attitude drives these outcomes?
Research on core self-evaluations suggests that people have a stable personality component that determines whether they feel they have self-worth, control over their lives, ability to achieve goals, and ability to control their emotions. This work has repeatedly demonstrated that people higher in these evaluations maintain motivation, have more job and life satisfaction, have more positive attitudes, and achieve more.
In another area of research on the powers of positive thinking, Emmons and McCullough have shown people who feel grateful for the good things in their life exercise more, feel healthier, achieve more goals, feel more enthusiasm, and sleep better. This was true even when participants were randomly assigned to one of three conditions. Participants focused on either: 1. everything that went wrong or was irritating 2. aspects of their lives for which they were grateful 3. recent everyday events They found people who focused on gratitude were happier, reported fewer negative physical symptoms such as headaches, and were more proactive in their lives. For example, they exercised more. People around them also noticed that the grateful group showed more joy, optimism, and energy. This did not happen in either of the other two groups.
Why do I write about this now? Because these are challenging and scary times. I will not be a person with rose-colored glasses. I see the reality for what it is. I'm even a bit paranoid, in part, because many of my paranoias have come true. But I will remain optimistic and grateful for that which is good in my life.
We are teaching our kids. Every night before we go to sleep we have T and R think of 5 things in our lives that make us happy or for which we are grateful. Family regularly appears in the list. I hope that is always true.
Off for a short run now.
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October 12th, 2008
10:53 pm - A Post from December 11, 2004
In 2004, I was just beginning to understand what was happening to our economy. I had just learned about OTC derivatives, changes in money supply, and the incredible debt load at the individual, state, and national levels. The more I learned, the more I feared. J taught me much of what I learned. Now I know quite a bit. J and I are both amazed that people never learn how the financial system really operates, even if they get MBAs. I decided to write a short post about the meaning of money and I hinted at a potential financial meltdown in the future. At the time J and I were uncertain but we both felt strongly enough to act.
I think I know where we are headed now but I don't want to write about it. Or talk about it. Or think about it.
12/11/04 01:45 am - Economics of the future Thought for the day: Money is worth only as much as everyone agrees it is worth. People have too much faith in money. Money has no meaning beyond that which we accord it. Some people just don’t get this. I have had conversations with many people who don’t understand that a dollar is intrinsically worthless. This is particularly true in a system that is based on fiat money rather than a system backed by something, anything, meaningful. The U.S. began the slippery slide when we got off the gold standard, but even gold is only worth as much as we decide it is worth. I can see why people argued that gold is irrelevant. But it forces the government to be honest when influencing the money supply. Gold and silver are more substantial than the current slips of paper we call dollars, which are backed by nothing more than the word of the government, which happens to be in fiscal crisis. Do people even know that we aren’t on the gold standard and that there is an unknown amount of gold in Fort Knox (possibly a very small amount)? The problem is that money is worth nothing unless we agree that it is exchangeable for something of value and without a standard to adhere to the value is undefined. Digital money is worse. The electronic blips that make up a bank account are a fiction if others decide the electronic blips have no value. The minute that there is a crisis of confidence the entire system fails. It’s useful to treat money as a tool for conveniently transmitting value but it is worth remembering that it is only as valuable as we all agree that it is. History has repeatedly demonstrated that currencies based on fiat money can and do fail. Read about the crisis of monetary confidence during the Revolutionary war. Look at the worthlessness of the currency notes from the Confederacy during the Civil War. More modern examples include the Deutschmark and the rupiah. A particularly deadly combination occurs when a government is off the gold or silver standard, heavily laden with debt, engages in expensive warfare, and then produces a heavy supply of fiat money to cover the debt. Seem familiar in 2004? Who knows what will happen. All the same, we have decided to move to a more conservative position in our assets.
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October 9th, 2008
03:19 pm - Time passes quickly
9 or 10 months since my last post? Incredible. So much to say, no time.
R turned 3, T is now 6. Funny kids. They both have Halloween brain. They can't focus on anything. I love their passion for life. We should all be like kids.
J and I are together. I'd like to think we are growing stronger.
I have a deep secret, a sacrifice, that I'm making for my family. Because I love them so. I will never reveal it to them. But it's a conscious choice as opposed to a hidden unhappiness that led to poor attitudes and behaviors on my part.
I'm still running but struggling. Time demands. Lately is has been challenging because I was sick for the last few weeks -- it's no fun to run while sick. But I've been staying with it. Lost some of the weight I had gained. Feeling a bit more fit. But not like when I ran the 6 minute mile. I want to get back there -- it felt so good. I'm not posting times yet because it is more important that I do the runs on a consistent basis.
Big news -- J is running with me now. Or I'm running with her. It's the same thing. After so many thousands of miles running alone or with the dog, I finally have a running partner! I'm happy about that.
J and I have finished our book and it's out. We can be Amazoned! We are editors of another series and have two different proposals in the works. The infernal chapter I was working on two years ago is finally coming out in print. Yay.
I remember years ago having conversations with Thunderslug and others here on LJ about the triple deficits, problems in the financial sector, and so forth. We talked about the need to buy gold for insurance back then. I was telling my family last fall that the big one was nearing. I took all of my retirement savings out of stocks and placed them in the money market and i-bonds. And I waited for the tsunami of bad investments and debt to hit.
Here it is. These are historic times. Not always a good thing!
J and I will weather this storm. We'll find a way, even if the entire state goes bankrupt and we have to find other means to support ourselves. I'm confident.
But I'm not optimistic about the economy or the stock market.
I will keep running. Stay fit. Maintain a positive attitude.
I think I might have a little SAD (seasonal affective disorder). We'll see this winter, right?
I also have determined that if I begin to drink more than 1 drink a night it becomes a vicious self-medicating cycle.
And I'm prone to addictions. I'm not alcholic. I'm not doing drugs at all. I don't smoke. But I can sense within myself that I'm prone to addictions of all types.
So I have to manage my emotions, attitudes, behaviors.
Be positive! Set and achieve those goals.
Bye for now. I apologize in advance for my failure to reply to comments. I have little windows of time and so much to do...life just keeps going and I have to keep up.
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January 2nd, 2008
02:20 pm - Forgot something important...
My sister (Sh) gave birth on October 31st so I'm an uncle now. My sister should be on Jerry Springer. Here's a quick review of her love life:
8 or so years ago going out with...I forget his name...oh yes, Gry. Gry seemed a very nice guy but had no direction and ambition.
She abruptly ended that relationship and started dating someone named Gbe. Gbe was very into karate and so too was my sister during that period. Unfortunately, Gbe didn't treat her well (no physical abuse but...) and he didn't know how to manage his business (always in severe debt). After 1-2 years, she left Gbe.
Shortly after leaving Gbe she met Jms. He seemed pretty cool, they went out for a several years. Then he finally became a firefighter (as he had been trying to do for all the years they were together). She said he seemed to change. Sh didn't like the changes and the loss of herself as a person to his career. She left Jms. He suddenly turned from nice guy to world class jerk (to our mom too, who is probably one of the nicest people who have ever lived).
Right after breaking up with Jms, Sh met Rb. Rb was in the military and scheduled to go to HI in only a couple of months. After two months of dating Sh dropped school and moved to HI with Rb even though only two people in the family had met him. None of us really knew anything about Rb and she was moving overseas with him. It was a scary time for us, watching from the sidelines. It turned out that he seemed a decent enough guy. He seemed to adore her and treated her well. The main problem was that he wanted children and she did not because she wanted to finish school and start her career. Despite this major difference in life goals, they seemed on track until he had to go to Iraq. Later my sister accidentally learned that he had been cheating on her with his ex-girlfriend (and potentially others) in the months leading up to his deployment. Things came to a head while he was still in Iraq and they broke up. Rb turned out to be a world class jerk upon break up. This took place fall of 2006 or something like that. The divorce just recently became final (I think).
Before Sh had completed her divorce with Rb, a co-worker named Jf proclaimed his love to Sh. He was a dear friend and Sh had never thought of him romantically. Apparently he had always had feelings for her but kept them hidden. There were two windows when he could have let her know of his feelings because she was between relationships. At the time he decided not to rush to approach her. Unfortunately for him, the windows were open for a short time and he missed both opportunities. This time he said "carpe diem" and told her of his feelings right after he heard about the problems with Rb. By January 2007 they had dated several times. They began slowly, going out first as friends as my sister considered the possibility of a relationship. Later Sh learned she was pregnant despite use of condoms and birth control. She knew she was getting older and if she was ever going to be a mom this might be the time. Despite the newness of her relationship with Jf she decided to have the baby. Thus, I became an uncle on All Hallows' Eve 2007.
Time to run (3.1 miles) and shower before picking up the boys so T can go to Tae Kwon Do.
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12:52 pm - I have to write something positive
The boys are amazing and amazingly funny.
T is still bent on becoming a robotic engineer. He regularly says things like "my robots will make things to help the earth" and "my robots will protect us" and so on. I've been impressed with his ability to assemble fairly complex Lego sets with minimal help. He can add 2 or 3 low numbers together, he understands very simple multiplication, and he can read simple books now. He wants to learn to read and do math so he can learn to build robots. He also started Tae Kwon Do over the summer and tested and earned his purple belt a couple of weeks ago. J and I felt happy and proud. The other day he called the paper shredder a paper blender -- funny and true.
R is an abstract thinker. You can see it already at the age of 2 1/2. He does more pretend play than his brother ever did and he seems to be the master of one trial learning (which is a problem if you let him see how a seat buckle works). He have a very sweet and compassionate disposition and amazing athletic skills (he's fairly ripped for a 2 year old). He adores T and it's fun to see the two of them playing together. The other day we went to the Natural History Museum and the kids were able to pretend to be paleontologists with a chisel, brush, and safety googles. R looked up with a huge grin, held up his hand, and said I have a CHEESEL! Somehow that was hilarious and we all laughed for a bit (including the employee who was overseeing the exhibit). R pooped in the potty for the first time on 11/25, then again a couple days later. We thought great, we'll be potty trained in no time. No dice. He hasn't done it since.
The boys do love Santa.
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12:29 pm - Being honest...
If I'm being honest with myself, and I suppose I should be honest here if I'm going to be honest anywhere, I've not been doing a good job of living life. The lack of posts are symptomatic of a deeper issue. My conditioning and overall health have waned and I've put on more pounds than I care to admit. I'm nowhere near my terrible state of health when I first began running but I am not taking care of myself.
On the other hand, there's plenty of good to be found in my life. I'll focus on that and I'll try to post my 2007 holiday letter some time soon (it's late as always).
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